No one has ever let me cook for Thanksgiving before, but I’m trying not to take it personally. 

A few years ago, my dad hosted a small family Thanksgiving; when I tried to master the salad spinner, I was shooed out of the kitchen by his then-girlfriend, known for her Martha Stewart abilities. 

I spent other Thanksgivings abroad and we often went to hotel buffets because turkeys are in short supply in South Korea. The few Thanksgivings that we had with turkeys at friends houses were difficult because most of didn’t have ovens. My -ex, aka, El Chef, once cajoled a Korean baker into cooking our turkey in the bakery’s convection oven. That Thanksgiving, my friends “allowed” me to bring the banana bread, which I had cooked in our toaster oven. 

This year, I’m going to my old college roommate’s for Thanksgiving. In college, neither one of us was known for our cooking abilities and not much has changed. She’s in charge of the turkey, her sister has graciously agreed to make the dessert, and I’m in charge of the carbs: stuffing, mashed potatoes, and maybe my Grandmother’s freezer rolls, if I feel up to the task. 

I’m going to make all of the carbs from scratch. I’m a little worried about the stuffing. Should I get tricky and risk a stuffing with sausage? (The worry is that my friend’s kids won’t like the extra-gourmet version of the stuffing.) Or do I stay simple with my stuffing? The mashed potatoes will be easy and I’m planning on recruiting the kids in attendance for the potato peeling and the mashing parts. (Potato mashing has to be one of the most satisfying things on the face of the earth.)

I’ve come a long way since the days of watching in wonder as people with cooking talent put together amazing meals. OK, not that far. I realize that there are people amongst us who are incredibly gifted in the culinary arts. I know my role in most situations involving the “others” or those who can cook: eat, smile, thank them profusely, eat some more, clear the table, and then do the dishes. 

But this Thanksgiving will be different. I’m attempting to do the impossible. If cooking were a sport, it would have to handicapped, much like bowling. I would be the handicap on most any cooking or bowling team. 

Stay tuned this week for more of my Thanksgiving cooking adventures.